Do you find yourself fuming when someone cuts you off in traffic? Does your blood pressure go through the roof when your child refuses to cooperate? Do you get agitated at work when your colleagues don’t do what you want them to? Anger is a normal and even healthy emotion—but it's important to deal with it in a positive way. Uncontrolled anger can take a toll on both your health and your relationships.
Ready to get your anger under control? Start by considering these 10 anger-management tips.
- Develop self-awareness for situations that tend to anger you.
- Take a time out to calm yourself and clear your head when fueled by anger. Take a deep breath from your diaphragm. This will help you cool off.
- Consciously regulate your emotions so you do not become emotionally “hijacked” by your anger.
- Make your relationships with others a priority. Remain respectful.
- Focus on what you can do in the present to solve the problem versus assigning blame or attacking.
- Choose your battles and learn when to let things go.
- Talk yourself down (e.g., Will expressing your anger in this matter help the situation?).
- Look at the situation from different perspectives. Try to let go of needing to be right and/or having people agree with you.
- Slow down and think about the situation before you react, and think about what you are going to say rather than saying the first thing that comes to mind when communicating with others.
- Acknowledge when your anger is valid, honor your feelings, and address your anger in a meaningful and effective way.
Additional resources:
McKay, Matthew, P. Rogers, & J. McKay (1989). When Anger Hurts: Quieting the
Storm Within. Oakland, CA: New Harbinger.
The Staff & Faculty Counseling Center can help you learn how to incorporate these elements in your life. For a free and confidential consultation with one of our counselors, please call and schedule an appointment at (310) 351-6259.
Campus Human Resources, Staff and Faculty Counseling Center
Phone: (310) 794-0245 | Fax: (310) 794-0251
